Tuesday, April 26, 2011

SPAIN

So guess who is going to Spain for 2 weeks? This guy! I can't wait! I'm so stoked for September to roll around! It has been 6 years since I have been back and it's gonna be interesting to be there without being a missionary!

Monday, April 18, 2011

Ocean Critters

I'm sorry to all of you that love those land critters, I love them too, but the ocean life to me is far cooler then any land animal. Unless I could find a way to get a dino. That would be pretty cool.

One of the main things I miss about living in Cali, was going to the beaches and chasing after fish diving with them and playing around in the tide pools catching crabs and checking out whatever was in them. I got scuba certified when I was 17 and it has been a blast. I haven't had the chance to do much diving, but whenever I get the chance to I'm underneath the water. Last year I was in Mexico, and we went to the beach while we were there and it amazed me at how close all the fish were to the beach. As long as I stayed by the rocks there were hundreds of colorful fish everywhere! It was like a big salt water tank in your house. It was so cool. I tried to get a bunch of pictures of them, but the underwater camera I have is pretty crappy. I might have to invest in a new one soon, because seriously the fish are amazing! I did venture a little farther south more out to the ocean when I was in Mexico because I wanted to see if the fish got any bigger and boy did they! I scared a huge school of tuna that had to have some fish in there that weighed close to over 40 pounds. They were big suckers. The water got really dark and kinda scary though cause every now and then you would see some huge thing swim in really close to me then take off, and I couldn't tell what it was. So I decided to stay close to the shore cause I didn't have any scuba gear just snorkel and no knife on me. Plus it was a lot lighter closer to shore. I realized once I got back in I was diving down about 20ft and with a snorkel you just can't enjoy as much that way. I was getting tired of going down for about a minute and a half then swimming back up and going back down not being able to find the fish I was following. So I stayed close to the shore and close to the rocks, which didn't really matter because there were still hundreds of fish in the rocks everywhere! The only downside was that my body was cut all over where I was slammed against the rocks when the waves came up and went out. I had my wetsuit shirt on so that wasn't as bad but it still hurt. It was amazing.

There was the time I got to swim with the Beluga Whales at Sea World. That was um basically pretty much the coolest thing ever! Those animals are so majestic and so powerful. Also the water was butt cold. I didn't care though. It was just cool being able to be with them in the water swimming around and it's something I'm gonna do every time I go down now. One of my main goals in life is to swim with 2 species of shark. A Whale Shark, and a Great White Shark. I wanna ride a Whale Shark so bad! It would be pretty awesome. I'm also totally fine with being in the water with a Great White without the cage. Yes that sounds crazy to a lot of you, but who cares what you think this is my dream! Lol..

I don't know, there is just something about me being in the ocean that calms me down. Whether it's being around the hundreds of fish, gliding over the waves on a surfboard, o the fact that when I am under the water, the only thing I can hear is the waves going back and forth and me breathing. There is nothing else there. It's silent. Nothing but you and the countless fish and things that create an enormous beauty. I've always wondered what it would of been like for the first people to go in the water diving to see what they saw. To be the first deep see divers that went down and saw some of the deep sea creatures that look like something out of the twilight zone. I hope I'm around when the first Giant Squid is captured alive. I've always wanted to see one. I'm just fascinated by the crazy gigantic amounts of animal life that is there. Also the fact that less then half of the ocean has been explored. Meaning who knows what else could be down there. It all makes me so excited and happy to think about! I really wanna be a part of it all somehow. I need to figure that one out.

Monday, April 11, 2011

Conference Weekend

Conference weekend is always a fun weekend. You get together with family o friends and just enjoy Saturday and Sunday and listen and learn to the apostles and prophets speak from the heart about matters they feel important enough to share 2 times a year with the whole world. This year was a little different for me. Last year I was watching with Katie, and after we watched the last session we cuddled up to a movie and decided we wanted to start planning our lives together. It was a pretty awesome feeling. Well if you have read the last few posts, you all know how that went.

So this year I have to be honest. I wasn't really looking forward to conference at all. I never have watched o listened to Saturday sessions, it was just something my family never did together. I only started going to priesthood session about 8 years ago, and I loved going. This year I didn't even wanna go to that. So the time came to go, I got a text from my best friend asking me if I was coming so they could save me a seat and I decided because he wanted to know, I was gonna go. So I got dressed and headed on over to where my old stake center so I could go watch. Well on the way there I got pulled over on the freeway and got a ticket, so I was kinda mad about that. Priesthood is one of my favorites because it is primarily addressed just to the guys, on a few occasions they do talk to the women of the church but it's very rare. So its always nice to have something just for us guys. Well the main focus of this session seemed to be about getting married. Oh goody. Well after the session was over was when the texts started to flow in, "Were you paying attention" "Was this session for you" "Looks like it's time to get married" I just kinda laughed at these and was like yea I guess so. Totally thought that would be the last of the "marriage" talks during conference. Dang was I wrong. Both sessions on Sunday had I think I was 2 talks each about marriage and the importance of getting married now and all of that jazz. Once again the texts came flowing in. I went over to a friends house that night, but I wasn't really there I guess. I had way too much on my mind and I was trying to distract myself, but it just wasn't working very well. Can't say I was too happy to go to work the following Monday either.

Monday came along and I was doing pretty good, no one seemed to be bugging me about anything like that. You see I'm the only single guy in the whole office. Well besides one of my friends but he is dating someone at the moment. So the day was going pretty well up until lunch time. We all got to lunch sat down and started eating. We had our normal conversations that we do at lunch, recent events, sports and so on. All was interrupted when the chief as we call him looked over at me and was like Mont, did you see conference this weekend? Yes I replied, and he replied with well, what are you gonna do about it? and it started. The rest of lunch was all about helping me find and marry my wife, thoughts about why I'm not married yet and whats wrong with me in general. The same usual things I get at lunch. I'm pretty sure they all except for my best bud think I'm over Katie and have totally moved on. I remember going home that night and just crashing on my bed. I still have the first picture that Katie and I took together and I hadn't been able to find it to get rid of it, but for some reason there it was in plain sight. I picked it up and just looked at it for a while, we took it up on a mountain over looking the valley after about a week of not seeing each other. It was a really happy moment, one I thought should be kept, so I framed it. Whether she still has hers o not I don't know, but for some reason I still have mine. I could feel the tears starting to run down my check so I had to toss it away. I don't know where it went, in my room somewhere, and I kinda just turned out the lights and cuddled into a ball. I couldn't sleep that night and for some reason I just stared at my phone o the ceiling, hoping to get something from her, but of course nothing came.

It's not like I haven't tried to get married. To find that one person that will go to the ends of eternity with me and then some. I know more o less what I want and I go for it. I've been done with just "dating for fun" for a long time now. To be honest she was the closet person to that eternal perspective that I ever have had. I remember the first time we talked about it together, we both got scared she left and I didn't hear from her for 3 weeks, she popped up one day at my house and we decided to hold that off for now but keep it in mind. The first time I knew that without a doubt in my mind I was in love with her was on my birthday last year. She planned the entire thing and I had almost no idea what we were gonna be doing that day. We spent from 9 in the morning till about 11 that night together. I went over to her house and picked her up and we headed up to Salt lake to go to the Planetarium and the Zoo. Which both were pretty amazing. Then we headed back grabbed some dinner at Tucanos, were supper tired went back to my place and took a nap, then we thought about going to see a movie, but she was way too tired to stay awake anymore, so I took her home, gave her a hug thanked her for an incredible birthday and kissed her goodnight. It was at that moment that a shock wave went through my body, and I knew then that I loved her with all my heart. Little did I know that she felt the same way I did. I had always thought that I was in love with a couple other of the girls I dated, but it wasn't till that moment that I felt what true love is. Maybe that's why this time around it's been so heartbreaking and heard to deal with. Why almost 5 months after she left little things still remind me of her, almost every girl I meet is named Katie and it's kinda driving me crazy.

Back to conference, they had some wonderful messages that were given that really did strike a chord on me this year. Mainly Pres. Monsons talk at the end of the Priesthood session. He talked directly at the guys my age about it being the time to find her take her to the temple and be sealed for all time. I want so bad to meet that man, fall apart in his arms and ask him how do I do that, because I apparently have no clue what I'm doing. I've tried so many things, and all I end up with is you are a great guy and she's out there. Not to be rude, but I'm getting really tired of hearing all that crap. I've spent the last week o so since conference thinking about things and mainly thinking about what I'm doing wrong. I know that I have things to work on, and I'm doing my best to do that. I just wish I didn't have to do it alone. This last week has been pretty good for me thinking wise though. It has made me see how hard Satan is working on me in some areas.....mainly this one...and to be honest I have let him win a few rounds. I have let myself slip away in the dating world a do a few things I know I never should have. Those things have been fixed now and are over with but it feels like he is trying again. I wish I could know why dating for me has to be so hard, what I'm doing wrong, what I could do better o what roads I need to be on to meet that person that is doomed to spending the rest of eternity with me....lol I wish I knew why this time in my life this break up is kicking my butt as hard as it is. It's been close to 5 months since she walked out of my life and it feels everyday like it was just yesterday that I was holding her in my arms telling her I love her. Last night was one of those nights that I wish I could just crawl into a cave and scream away. I don't know what got to me but man it was bad. I went home after FHE and pulled out a chair and sat in front of my fish tank. Something about that tank calms me down all the time. That and my geckos, I love holding them and seeing them in their own little world in my room. I felt a little better that night, but woke up this morning with that feeling of emptiness, wanting so much more. I apologize to my friends who are worried for me, and have tried talking to me, I'm just not really in the mood right now. I don't know why I just prefer to be alone at the moment. I just feel so lost and alone right now and I don't quite know how to fix it. I wish she would show up soon though. I have so much to give.

Tuesday, April 5, 2011

Nutty Putty Caves

This is something that has been on my mind for a long time, and it kinda goes with other things out there as well right now, with parents and their kids. I hope I don't really offend anyone with this post, but to be honest if I do, oh well I could really care less.

I was first introduced to the caves back like 14 years ago when I was first in the scouts. My buddy Cam and I were getting ready to go on one of many new awesome camp outs and this was one of the first as deacons. We all got to the area set up camp and got settled in. We all had tin foil dinners for dinner and this was the start of my moms amazing tin foil dinners that she made for me and that I would eat for almost every camp out I ever went on. So good! We were wondering if the first night was just gonna be a chill night, but around 11pm we grabbed our gear and started climbing the hill. Now I had heard of the cave before but never really ever been there. So I was pretty excited. I had heard that it was super tiny and I wasn't sure if I was afraid of tight spaces so this would be a good way to find out haha. When they said we were here I was trying to see an entrance to a cave in the hillside, but didn't see anything till they motioned me to this huge hole in the ground with like a ten foot climb down to the bottom, then there was a plank of wood for some reason. We climbed down and then I got to look at the real entrance to the cave. It was about a 2ft high by maybe 3ft wide hole in the ground that you had to crawl through to get into the cave. This part was pretty easy for me due to the fact that I was super tiny and skinny. Not like much has changed. So I was the first one in and Cam followed suit. They had us designate the buddy system so we wouldn't get lost while we were there. Once you got inside the cave you could stand up and had to walk over to an area that had about a 50ft descend into the belly of this thing. There was a rope ladder and I thought that was pretty awesome. We got the group down there and had a really good time, and pretty much lost track of time. We came out of the cave at around 6 in the morning, went to bed for a bit and then got dressed and went right back in. One of my favorite parts about the cave was the fact that it was about 80 degrees inside the thing. You were always warm once inside no matter how cold it was outside. We went many times during the winter just cause you could and still be perfectly warm. You would get super dirty cause most of the time you are crawling around everywhere, and with the heat and moisture, you went in clean and came out a dirt clod. Basically it was an amazing amount of fun that you would totally forget what was going on outside of the cave or what time it was. It was great, I've spent hours inside this thing just climbing around and experiencing new stuff. One of my favorite parts of the cave is a place called the birth canal. The main reason for the name is the fact that the entrance of the thing is almost too small for me. You have to start out by putting your arms either in front of you, o to the sides of your body and leave them there because you won't be able to move them at all once you get started. It's not a very long crawl, but it opens up to a good sized room once you get in there. Needless to say this place was amazing.

I guess the main reason for this post is to talk about the stupid people that went down there, with the end result of them blowing up the entrance to the cave, thus making me sad and kinda mad and wanting the cave back. You see people get stuck in this thing all the time, because they don't know what they are doing, o they don't have all o the right equipment that they would need for it. We were sat down as 12 year old's and told what to bring, a knife, 2 flashlights, and an extra pear of batteries in case your lights go out. So we would always go prepared because we know what could happen down there if one of these things went wrong. I remember a time a kid was with his group down there, didn't listen and strayed off from his group. He got turned around in a section of the cave and then his light went out. He was lost down there for almost 2 days. Luckily for him another group decided to go the same way he went and found him, the kid said he could hear voices around him but didn't know where they were coming from. Turns out he was barely 8ft away from the entrance to the room, but couldn't see it because it was so dark. Our leaders took us to the room and had us turn out our lights so we could see what it was like. I remember not being able to see my hand, even when I touched it to my nose. It was super dark down there even with lights at times and I promised myself I would never go unprepared down there. We had a couple kids in our group once that thought they were too cool to stay with our group and decided to not listen to our leaders and stray off. One of them got stuck and was stuck were he was for about 9 hours. It wasn't until a scout troop with a rope came through that we were able to get him out. It was a pretty scary time though. Now on to the reason the cave was closed. There are a couple. Some friends and I went down the night before they put a gate over it, we didn't know they were doing it though. The gate made it so you had to have a key and permission from the city to go down in the cave. After they did that there wasn't any problems for the first few months. Then the person that got it closed for good went down. With what I'm saying I mean no disrespect to the family of the man o the man himself, but all in all he was a moron. The number one rule of caving.......No matter how good of a cave you may think you are you should never go by yourself, always have a buddy. Um duh common sense. Especially in a cave like this one that has 26 miles of cave awesomeness. This is the number one rule and he broke it and payed for it with his life. Super sad. Problem number two for Mr. I'm hugely experienced caver man. There is a portion of the cave that you just don't go in, the 50 billion people that know about this cave know this. Why? because people get stuck in it all the time. Why? because at the top of this ceiling hole in the wall it curves in a way that leaves the bottom half of you dangling in a way that makes it quite hard to get back out o any farther in. Let me set the scene for you. He goes by himself, goes through the birth canal and decides to try this no go hole. Gets stuck, obviously thinks that if you go farther you can get out. WRONG! He slipped and basically wedged himself to a point where there was no where to go. They didn't realize he was gone for a long time and they tried all they could to get him out but to no avail. He passed away in the cave a few days later. Very Very Sad.

In a way though I don't really feel sorry for him. I feel sorry that he did something so stupid that he thought he could beat. I feel sorry that his family has to be without their son because he made a stupid choice. I'm also kinda mad at the family as well, because of their actions in demanding that the cave be blown up to prevent and further incident, they took away something from millions of people that was one of the coolest things to be able to do in this state, and really for no reason at all. No one before their son has ever died in the caves. Sure people have gotten stuck, but they were with other people and could get out. Even the owner of the cave wanted to just seal that area off and it would of been totally fine. No the parents wanted it sealed for ever. So they dumped concrete down the entrance then blew it up. Which kinda makes me wonder what kinda people we are turning into these days. Anything dangerous comes along and we just get rid of it, instead of embracing it for the awesome power and thing it has. Instead of learning about it and taking the necessary steps to prevent accident. Back when I was a kid we did so many things that parents now a days would look at as super dangerous and why would our parents ever let us do them. I still do a lot of those things. It's hilarious to look at parents now a days and tell them what I've done o wanna do in my life. My ex's mother had a hard time believing and ended up not liking me because of the fact that I wanna work at Sea World as a trainer with the killer whales, because a trainer was killed last year. SO WHAT? It's one of the most amazing jobs in the world. Yes my parents let me do a lot of really amazing things that hell yes could of gotten me killed, o seriously hurt. But I learned about these things and took every precaution to make sure I didn't hurt myself o those around me. That seems to be the problem now a days with some people. They don't wanna take the time to learn and do the necessary things to make sure the trip is safe. Lots of people are getting hurt o passing away because they just don't care anymore. Makes me sad.

Friday, April 1, 2011

Rugby

I figured I would step away from the post about me and a certain person right now and get back to some other things in my life... I watched a rugby game the other night when I was just chillen with a buddy after FHE and it brought back a lot of memories. It was my senior year at Lone Peak the Football season was over and I went from being busy every day practicing till Fridays when we had our Games to doing nothing. The season was over and we had a great one, even if it was cut short in the semi finals. I had no idea what I was gonna do lol. I had been in a routine for the last almost 9 months and it had suddenly gone away and I wasn't quite sure what I was gonna fill it with. A buddy of mine brought up playing Lacrosse and we were pretty stoked about trying out when we saw a poster stating that Lone Peak would be putting together a rugby team. We really didn't have much of an idea of what rugby was but it sounded fun so we figured lets go for that instead. Little did we know what we were really getting into. We went to the first meeting at the school and were told that we would have a coaches parents meeting that following Monday and unless we had our parents there we would not be allowed to play. Something about the importance of realizing what we were getting into lol. So I went home told my parents that I wanted to play and that I needed one of them for the next Monday to come with me. They both kinda chuckled when I told them that I wanted to play the sport, but they remembered how much I had learned and how well football was for me. So my dad decided to go to the meeting. We got there about 20 minutes early because that is how my dad works and got our seats right up front, oh yea because we were the only ones there. More people started to flow in, and I was getting a look at what the team would be like if some of these guys played. We had tall guys, short guys, some pretty buff guys and some just out of shape fatt people. A kid about twice my size and his mom took their seats next to me and a man we soon leanred would be one of our coaches came into the room and began to introduce himself and the rest of the coaching staff. He then started out by telling us how dangerous the game is and that we would be spending a good amount of time preparing. The rest of the coached introduced themselves then they talked to the parents and let them know the dangers as well. They showed us a video next of my now favorite team The All Blacks. They showed us how the game is played then showed us a video of some injuries in the game. Which were awesome! What was even mor funny was the mother next to me of the giant telling her son that she will not let him play this game, and my dad telling me how much I'm going to love this game. Super funny. We were then told that those of us that wanted to play, the practices were to begin that following week and we needed to bring our hundred dollars for fees and uniforms and so on. I was stoked! The game looked so fun! Also pretty crazy. My dad went home told my mom I was gonna die, and she just laughed. Yes my parents love me so much haha. That following week came and Cam and I were pretty stoked to see how many people showed up. It was pretty surprising to see around 80 guys there. Little did we know that, that number would greatly drop in the next couple months as the practices move along. Basically practices consisted of, running, tackling drills, more running, more drills and then a scrimmage. We practiced this way the whole entire season. I remember after the first one going home and not being able to move the next day. The game was just like playing football without pads when I was a kid but so much more. The following months went along and we had weeded out more kids. We got close to game time and the coaches were pretty sure of who was gonna be there and who wasn't. So they had a positioning practice. You see the months prior were basically just to weed out people and pansies as said by the coaches and we mainly just played wherever they wanted us to during the scrimmage games. So it was pretty exciting to hear that we would finally be put in a place. I knew that mine would be not a forward position cause those guys needed to be fat and big lol. So I was gonna be one of 8 other spots. I was eventually put as a fullback because I was quick and a good kicker(I spent almost 3 years practicing that as a kicker) so it made sense. The day came finally for our first game and wow we were pretty stoked. My family couldn't come, they were on a trip so I went with Cams mom and him. We showed up it was in a blizzard and we were playing Highland High, Well here is why we crapped our pants. Highland High was and still is ranked number one in the nation and number three in the world for high school teams. They are basically huge and crazy and were breed to play the game. Their team is made up of all Tongans and One White guy. lol. So needless to say we were pretty freaked out. The game went well we lost, but only by a few tries. We also put points on the board with a field goal, and we were told at the end of the game that no first year team ever scored against them and we and the coaches should be proud that they and their team played so well. I was in so much pain the next day lol. I was cleated crushed and pounded into the ground by people that out weighed me by at least 100lbs the whole game.....and I loved every minute of it! My grandma came to one game and it was probably one of the funniest things I have ever seen. She was freaking out the whole game. I finished out the season with a new group of friends and a new found respect for a game that can teach you so much, while at the same time beat the crap out of you. We had many players get hurt and because of their injuries they were not allowed to play anymore...that just gave us more fire to play harder. We ended the season really well and actually won a lot of our games. I learned so much about respect and trust playing this game and could go on forever about it, but I wont to spare you all non rugby people....all in all it was a great game, that I love and always will love.